i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
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