My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
