you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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