i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize