I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
