you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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