paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize