Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
