Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
