This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
