some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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