I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
