Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
