Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Randomize
