he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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