"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
