i was born a porn star she said
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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