it hurts more in the daytime
Banned from zoo.
Again?
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
