my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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