it's like iHOP with fire
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
