Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
