I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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