No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
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