that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Randomize
