Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize