And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
