Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Randomize
