he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize