i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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