I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
