we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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