I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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