How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
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