hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
He passed out mid-signature
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Randomize
