How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
you will always have a special place in my vag
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Damn victory sex feels great
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