Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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