quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize