about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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