Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
