please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
