So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
