If i come over, it means nothing
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize