Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize