Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
