No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
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