My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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