Cold hands, warm shart.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
