i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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