Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I love having hate sex.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
