I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Let's get the cat blown out
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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